Barnes Family Christmas

Defusing a Chrono Bomb Step 1

Sadly the process is not simple and the people that made it have deliberately made it as difficult as possible. They also tend to scrub the web of any references to the device so I don’t expect this post to last long. If you see it, copy it to paper, write it on a wall, whatever you need to do to save the information so others can find it.

1. Find the switch that is on 2/3 of the time and turn it down.
2. Find some wire cutters, you’re going to need them. Cut only the wires on the wiring diagram and cut them all at once.
3. You will need 4 keys. One of them is metallic with only a single prong.
4. Another is the darkest key that has 2 prongs
5. Find one of the remaining ones with a single prong on one side if the color is red the color is wrong
6. The final key is a double wide the color of papaya on the inside.
7. One arrow left, the other is right, the C arrow points up with black left and right
8. The order is simple and go from left to right. First put E at the front, parallelogram next, then 2 going down, the last is the first only turn it around.

Good LUCK, you’ll need it.

Bread

I really want to learn to bake bread.
Leave me suggestions!

Thinking is Evil

Took a nap.  I remember I used to hate those.   Now they’re heaven.

But my lovely nap was interrupted by my brain.   In Kanji the word for half includes the radical for sword/cut.

Well, duh… of course it would.   To get a fraction, you take a whole and cut it into pieces of the whole, right???

Right??

See, that’s what woke me up (of all things)  My mind is a Jim Henson’s Labyrinth of weirdness sometimes.

So… if I take ONE apple and I cut it through the center the remaining parts on the table are ½ of an apple.   The original whole apple is now GONE… DISAPPEARED and replaced with these two halves (or 4 quarters, etc.)

Which I can reconcile, but… what about something that was never a WHOLE in the first place???

Walnuts are two halves forced together against their will by a shell, and oranges are merely fractional segments inside of a convenient carrying case!

And POMEGRANATES!!!   Don’t get me started on pomegranates.  

For that kind of forced living situations, I’m thinking of calling it a delicious concentration camp!

Call the UN!

Instant Hangover

Have you ever gone down a waterslide that was so fast that, despite having turns and coils, etc, was simply too fast?   All you can do is hold yourself together long enough to survive the experience and when it’s over you spend the preceding time just reminding yourself to breath?

Do you know that feeling?

Yeah, me too.   That is what it’s like being married to Galen and having inspirational tornados like my kids (who slot in with his personality perfectly)

It’s complete madness with a potential for alcohol abuse. 

And I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

Embrace Chaos!!!

Yeah… I know… I’m easily impressed.

Wanna try a cool trick?

Ok… so… think of a number but keep it secret.

I mean it… DON”T tell me!!!   (I’m a blabbermouth)

Double it.

Add 12.

Subtract 4.

Divide by 2.

Subtract your original number.

Add 4

Double it.

Multiply by 5.

Knock off the last digit

Got your final number?  Good!

Then I will do my creepiest impression of a boardwalk psychic… wiggling fingers,candles, shawls and all.

::ridiculously stereotypical Russian accent::   “You vill find dat eef yu luk into my eyes, dat i really need more sleep.    But den I vill closs my eyes and rub my temples and tell yu dat I haf seen into yur brain and stolen the answer yu vere keeping heeden.

Your final answer is EIGHT!!!

Cool, huh?   

::crickets::

 Whoa… Tough crowd

Top 10 List!!!

Ice Cream is YUMMY!

Galen says I’m easily distracted. I respectfully disagree

He says, “Watch where you’re driving!”

And I say, “Look!   Ice Cream!”

Who needs bumpers anyway?

Spelling Stuff With Stephen

Quilting: Spelt, Q-W-I-L-L-T-I-N-G
Sepulcher: Spelt, S-U-H-P-U-L-L-K-U-R
Theatrical: Spelt, T-H-E-E-@-T-R-I-C-K-L-E
Quiznos: Spelt, S-U-B-W-A-Y

Fruit Colours

Orange.